David Len and Our Story

It is so easy to listen to others talk about the wonderful things their husbands do and think negatively about your own because he didn't do those things for you when in reality, you would never wish it to be any other way.

I thought it would be nice to write something about my beloved. I love him more than words can say and he is my bestest friend. He deserves his own post.

I knew Dave as a little girl. I was in his brothers Sunday school class and was three years older then him so, needless to say, Dave was invisible to me at that time. A few years after their family came to my church, a new church was started out in Russell (his home town) so they moved to that church. That was the end of the van der Meers in my life until years later.

In university, my best friend, Vanessa, began dating Cory (the boy in my Sunday school class) and here the connection began again. I was a bit disgruntled with Cory because he kept stealing my friend from me but I knew she was happy and so I made it through :) Vanessa had a scheme. She wanted to introduce Cory's brother (Dave) to me and hope we hit it off. Then we would be sisters. So, one summer came and we were all headed to a cottage and Surprise! Dave came up to the cottage with Vanessa and Cory.

I was wearing my bathing suit, no makeup, playing volleyball with a soccer ball and didnt care at all that a handsome man had just showed up. This is odd for me since a few years before this I would have felt timid and pretended to be a different person. I was in a good place. I had God on my mind and just wanted to be happy with where I was. So, Dave and I chatted openly. I have to say, God was so good to me because I was not hiding any of my quirks. I talked to Dave about the colloquial meaning of the word "beaver" which was incredibly awkward for Dave I later found out, I acted like my hyper, crazy, happy self and just enjoyed being me in front of whoever cared to talk to me.

Me being me in my bathingsuit with a huge lump on my arm from playing volleyball with a soccer ball.

Dave practicing his juggling after we finished the game.

One night everyone was in the cottage talking and playing games when Dave went out into a boat near the dock and just stared at the stars. I turned to Cory and Ness and said, "Maybe I should go out and join him. He's all alone." Cory, however, told me not to bother "because sometimes Dave just likes to be alone." So I didn't go out but I felt sorry for Dave all alone. I found out a few months later that Dave was hopeful that I would come out and sit with him. (1. He is romantic!)

We returned home and a short time later it was Labour Day weekend. That means that our churches have a camp weekend and those who don't go, all meet at the Ottawa Church (mine) for worship. I rarely go to this weekend because I never really enjoyed it as a kid. I tagged around with my mother who I'm sure wished I would find something else to do. Seeing as how I had no fond memories of it, I decided not to go and who else didn't go? Dave. Of course, being me I didnt notice that he was there until I was leaving. I felt horrible. I felt like a bad friend. I didnt say hi or anything and I worried that he would think I was avoiding him... the things we think and feel in the beginning eh? Dave had other plans, however. My siblings and I all headed out to the park later in the day and somehow, Dave was driving by and saw us. So, he pulled his truck over and found us at the park. I didn't see him until he popped out from behind a tree and started to talk to my sister. He came to ask me if I wanted to go rollerblading with him. So, we all headed back home so I could get my blades. While walking home my niece peed on my neck (she was on my shoulders) and so I had to rush inside and change my shirt. In my haste to be urine free I forgot to bring Dave inside and introduce him to my parents (who already knew him but it's the polite thing to do) and went right up to my room to change. That meant Dave kind of had to just walk into my house all alone and introduce himself (2. He is very brave), (3. He is fantastic in social situations).

After our first rollerblading "date" everything took off from there. We roller bladed together so often, went to bible study together and often went out for dinner. He would never let me open my own car door or any door for that matter(4. chivalrous), he always had me order first and he treated me with the greatest respect. He wouldn't come into my apartment (not even the doorway) without others being present (5. honorable and 6. respectful). Both he and I were on the same page. We weren't dating for fun but to find our husband/wife.

At the beginning of our relationship I remember going to visit Vanessa at teachers college and Dave had gone to Nova Scotia to visit his friend. I got super paranoid believing that he had left and was going to stay there and break up with me. I kept sending him these paranoid texts without really telling him I was paranoid and hoping he would give me some sign of his desire to still come back to me. He did come back (obviously) and he even brought me a present (aww)(7. He is patient). I found out later that he had asked my father for permission to date me that weekend when he had come back and I was still away (8. He is traditional in a very good way). Thus the official dating began.

I continued to be my real self which I think scared Dave a little. I remember spending a meal with Vanessa's family and after eating so much, undoing my pants and telling everyone about it. I mean, wouldn't you? Boy am I socially stunted! But Dave just took that to be me. Unfortunately it is! And he still loves me for me.

Can you see the white spots on Daves chest? He spelled my name with sunscreen so it says "Kate" on his chest. Awww! hahaha!

Dave is always ready to listen to me, he desires to please me and make me smile. He loves that we have two boys and loves on them like the greatest dad in the world. He is patient with me when I spend too much money and even encourages me that it will get easier. He is always ready to give me more money if I need it with a cute little look that says "but try and be careful next time!" (Budgeting is a very new thing to me and it has been less than three years. The concept has really been good for me and often I do a great job with the finances but sometimes I get a little too... spendy). He respects and loves my job as a home maker and is so oblivious when the house is a mess. He truly only want to come home to a happy wife. If the house is clean, its just a bonus. He desires the best for me and our family and works hard as the breadwinner to "bring home the bacon". He never likes to sit still for long. He loves working with his hands (he makes beautiful furniture) and he adores playing with Matty. (Please note, I love mothering but I do not love playing).

At times I can get annoyed, wondering why I have to take out the garbage, bring in all the heavy bags, build my own IKEA furniture, do all the dishes, constantly pick up things from the floor... but then I remember, I have always been proud of doing things on my own. I am capable of bringing out the garbage so I do it, I am strong enough to bring in the grocery bags so I do it, I am home all day so I can pick up things off the floor, I want things done now so I do them.

I have the greatest husband on the planet. Every day we learn how to better communicate and serve one another. We learn what we enjoy and what we find hard and dreary. We throw ideas at each other and talk out their coming about. He talks me down from unrealistic desires (new appliances in our one bedroom apartment- there is no where to put the old ones until we move so it really wouldn't work) and I talk him into necessary ones (a laundry hanging device or a room for Matty to sleep in).

I am so thankful that God blessed me with a man who fits me well. It has taken us time to learn how to communicate the way we will understand each other (and we will continue to learn this forever I am sure) but we haven't had any real fights yet which means we are doing ok so far. I know those will come and there will be times when we will not see eye to on on things but they will bne used to grow us even more and I look forward to what God has in store for us.